I wrote our story on a grain of rice, and then I lost it. It took four years to learn how to write on a grain of rice. I wrote the story in six months. I then realized I couldn’t yet write small enough to fit the story on a grain of rice, so I studied for another five years before I could do it. The actual inscription took a mere three months; I guess I should have known not to work near an open bag of rice. On the bright side, I haven’t seen her in a decade anyway.